Thursday, June 19, 2008

control


Wish me luck. I am going to try this stuff. Heather swears by it and many others agree that it puts them out. It is 10:56 p.m. and I just made it home. I bought the movie Control today and I really want to watch it so badly, but sleep is the priority at the moment.
Friday I will spend time with someone who noticed I was behaving better without meds(a future blog). She was the first to notice and she means a lot to me. A very good listener and an open mind. I love you Val for this and our time spent together is always treasured. You were the first mind that can keep my manic mind grounded when it is up. I alway think of you first when I am in this mood. Over the past years I have acquired a few more friends that have this power and I value them dearly. Yoko, you are the most recent one and I hope that I did not lose you my dear.
I can't wait to see this movie, it played in Washington D.C. for a second when it was released than it disappeared. If you are reading this Bonnie, this was the movie that we were going see when we met. Too bad you were ill. Some movies are best seen at the theater and I know this would be great on the big screen. Oh yeah Val, you better find I really need a good laugh.

=p

i'm otta here like last year

peace

11:32 p.m.

addict

2 hours of rest/need more!!!

It Was 40 Years Ago Today



awake for 25 hours so far.

why?

=[

TROG~SPORE!


Wednesday, June 18, 2008

aperture

I started looking @ this camera and went in different directions, but still come back to this model. A good friend suggested the name. Thank you! I have spent a lot of time researching, talking to others and viewing it's results. A few weeks ago I held a friend's D80. I had it in manual mode and just aimed it at random subjects without hitting the shutter and felt like {Oh yeah! this is what I need}. I feel good about this next step. My mind needs this badly and all I do is see images everyday/night that can not be captured. I have so many concepts in my head and also have a human subject that I want to document and experiment with. I just need the key to unlock my kaleidoscopic mind that has been somewhat closed and limited to a web cam for a month now. It has been one of the roughest months in my life. Up, down, diagonal and crushed to bits.
My art needs and will flow much better with this.